That's how we spent this evening. It was lovely. A couple of baaaaaad Star Trek episodes and a lot of laughter. I need silliness right now. Robbo brings out the silly in me, as do some of my best friends here.
Janet is still looking for a way to honor Mike's wish to be tossed at passers-by while we chant, "Body o' Mike." I don't think we'll do that. I don't know when I'll be ready to scatter his ashes. I have thought about inscribing the box with "Body o' Mike," though.
I visited Mike's MySpace page today. It made me laugh. He said he's mostly English and Irish, "so I hate myself for oppressing me." He said he was an egomaniac with an inferiority complex. He was clever and very, very funny.
I told Robbo about the time two and a half years ago, when we were sure he would die from lack of treatment for an intestinal blockage caused by radiation, he told me he loved his life. In the midst of pain and suffering caused by the neglect of doctors in Savannah, he still found ways to relish every moment. He wasn't bitter or angry about what was happening -- he was too busy living each moment.
That's what keeps me going when I feel overwhelmed. If he could love his life under those circumstances and if he could have fun on the final day of his life, I have to find joy too. There's no better way to honor him.
The ethicist from Memorial Health in Savannah, the hospital where Michael was so badly treated, never returned my call last week. I think I'll call tomorrow and leave another message, and if I don't hear back, I'll find an attorney to make the call for me. I don't want to sue anyone, but I do want an apology for what happened to my son. If I can't even get a call back from their ethics person when all I want to do is tell them what happened, then maybe it is time to force them to notice me.
I want them to admit that the doctor was wrong when he failed to treat Michael on two occassions when he knew there was a life-threatening problem. It's there in the records. I don't want money, I want someone to acknowledge that my son was treated poorly, and that somebody there knows it's wrong. I don't want somebody else's child to die from neglect.
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