Kicking off the holidays

Actually, the holidays start for me on Oct. 28, my older son's birthday. From there, it's Halloween, my grand-nephew, Liam's, birthday (Nov.2) Michael's and my birthday (Nov. 3), my anniversary (Nov. 12), my niece, Shannon's, birthday (Nov. 16).
By Thanksgiving I'm tired already. But it's still a favorite day for me. I love to cook (and eat). I bake cranberry bread, white bread, whole grain bread and pies, make stuffing (for inside the bird, thank you)and cook a ton of vegetables. Then we sit at the table and talk about why we're thankful.
There was the year my older son was mad at me and stormed up the stairs, yelling "You're the worst mother in the world and I have nothing to be thankful for!!" He was 15. A lot of people don't think they have much to be thankful for at that age. Now he's 35 and thankful for four healthy children and a lot more.
I think you really begin to understand thankful when you've almost lost something very dear, or when you have lost something very dear. My father was only 67 when he died; my sister only 56. I find myself being thankful for the time I had with them, even as I wish it could have been longer. Both of them were wonderful practical jokers and they would have loved one I played this week ...
This year I can be thankful my younger son had radiation damage and not cancer, and my mother's stroke wasn't serious.
My niece, Shannon, and I were talking tonight about what we're thankful for and what we might wish for. You know -- what you would do with $100 million.
I fantasize about giving $25 million or more to Duke University because the medical center there saved my son's life by taking him in when the doctors in Savannah left him to die. I'd give a few million to Eblen Charities because they paid for an antibiotic prescrtiption my son needed, and for all the other incredibly good work they do. I'd install an elevator at my church and put money away for college for all my grandkids and my sister's grandkids. I'd give to some of the nonprofits I write about for the paper because they make a difference in people's lives. (I'd also rip up the carpet in my house and replace it with hardwood floors and add a dining room to the house and travel a bit.)
Shannon said she would pay off all her debts and those of all her loved ones and buy a Toyota van so she could travel more comfortably with her husband and two kids, buy a house and enjoy not having to work.
"Spread it around," she said. "I don't need it all. I don't want stuff to show off the fact I have money."
Good thing, too. Shannon is studying to be a nurse and her husband is in the Army. Unless she hits the lottery, she won't be able to afford to buy stuff to show off the fact she has money.
I'm pretty thankful for Shannon. She's a lot like her mother: silly, kind, and just a bit twisted.
Gratitude is something people have to learn, I think. When you're a kid, you're thankful for your toys. Some people don't really mature much beyond that.
As I've experienced life, I think I've learned a lot more about gratitude and what I'm thankful for. I talked to a few Christian Scientists this week about gratitude. Thanksgiving is a big deal for them. They use it as a time to express gratitude to God for everything, especially God's grace and love and that it is available to everyone who seeks it. I think that sums it up pretty well.
So, when I start to stress about whether the Christmas cards will be out early enough, or whether I'll finish making scarves and potholders and whatnot before Christmas, I can return to what's really important: I have family and friends and nothing more serious than a broken ankle to worry about.