Talking to family

Mike's dad and brother, Scott were here again today and he told them both how much they mean to him and that he -- and they -- will be OK. It was hard for Scott to hear, I think. He went outside and stood in the yard for awhile.

Michael's father has physical issues of his own -- he has had colon cancer and has been cancer-free for several years, but the radiation damaged nerves in his lower spine so he has to use a walker now. My house is on a hill and it was really hard for him to get in. I told him I did buy a house on a hill on purpose six years ago just to give him a hard time.

"I didn't even need a walker then," he said.

"Oh, I know, but I had a premonition."

A friend of mine who is in Alcoholics Anonymous came by tonight with a couple other people to bring a meeting to Michael. That really meant a lot to him -- and to me.

Danny, who got here just before the meeting started, was amazed that Michael would still want a meeting.

"What's the point?"

The point is the fellowship, the sharing among people who have something very basic in common.

Lauren, who's almost 16 and an evangelical Christian, wanted to be sure her Uncle Mike is saved. I told her yes. He was saved in high school. He is not an evangelical, but he very much follows in the path of Christ.

And if God won't take him into Heaven, then I don't want to go there either.

I showed Lauren a bunch of pictures of Mike, from when he was 3 days old until just before he got sick. There are some very funny ones. I plan to scan in about 100 of them and burn them to about 50 discs so everyone who wants one can have one. My mother still looks at the one I made of photos of my sister after she died.

I told Danny the memorial service will be in Savanah and I hope people will get up and talk about him and what he meant to them. Danny, who usually avoids public speaking, asked if he could get up and say how proud he is to be Michael's brother. That's OK. I plan to talk about his twisted sense of humor -- about the cancer card in particular.

"...but I have CANCER," to which I must reply, "Cancer schmancer. I am so sick of hearing about your cancer."

The Hospice social worker came today and met with Michael. She was impressed with how serene he is and how he has accepted what is happening to him and is telling everyone how much he loves them. I think he has a different message for everybody, but I don't know. He's talking to everyone in private. Scott came out and went outside to be by himself for a few minutes, and when he came back, I told him I lost my sister two years ago and it's still hard for me sometimes, even though I know she's OK. His father broke down briefly before he left, as he told Janet hoe incredible he thinks it is for her to be here since they divorced two months ago.

Lauren seemed comforted after she talked with him.

Janet and I tucked him in at midnight. I hope he sleeps well.